


not like romeo and juliet

by sora_grey



Category: Class (TV 2016)
Genre: Crack, F/M, Fanfic Generator, Humor, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, apologies to william shakespeare, for god’s sake do not take this seriously, goddamn this is garbage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 14:09:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15950960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sora_grey/pseuds/sora_grey
Summary: A humorous version of Romeo and Juliet’s balcony scene, played by April (as Romeo) and Ram (as Juliet).





	not like romeo and juliet

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn’t sleep, so I went on drabblematic.com, which is basically like playing mad libs. If you haven’t been on that site, _do it now._ It’s terrific fun.
> 
> Anyway, I thought the following was really hella funny, so I decided to go ahead and post this. Sorry in advance for the irreverent piece of trash you’re about to read.

* * *

# April and Ram

by _William Shakespeare_

* * *

_Enter April_

_Ram appears above at a window_

**April:**  
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?  
It is the violin, and Ram is the badger.  
Arise, kind badger, and play the  
pearlescent sword.  
See, how he leans his heart upon his ear!  
O, that I were a glove upon that ear,  
That I might touch that heart!

 **Ram:**  
O April, April! wherefore art thou April?  
What's in a name? That which we call a hand  
By any other name would smell as wonderful.  
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say,  
“Like a beam of light, he shines  
In a sea of darkness,”  
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,  
Thou mayst prove modern.

 **April:**  
Swain, by yonder pearlescent sword I swear  
That tips in the shadows the shiny flowers—

 **Ram:**  
O, swear not by the sword, the genius sword,  
That nicely changes in its badass orb,  
Lest that thy love prove likewise badass.  
Sweet, nice night! A thousand times  
nice night!  
Parting is such special sorrow,  
That I shall say nice night till it be morrow.

 _Exit above_

**April:**  
Sleep dwell upon thy heart, peace in thine ear!  
Would I were sleep and peace, so carefully to  
rest!  
Briskly will I to my kind hand's cell,  
Its help to play, and my wonderful hand to tell.


End file.
